The interesting thing about this is that I do it to myself. It would take about one sentence to end it all. "Get out of my life." That's it. That is all I would have to say. I know, you're wondering why I don't just say it and move on with life. I guess it's because anything involving emotion is never that simple. The things that make me the most frustrated are usually closely tied to the things that make me the most happy. Strange isn't it? The people I care about the most are the ones who can make me lose it.
I've come to this conclusion: If they make your stomach twist into knots and are constantly in your thoughts; watch out! Caring means hurting. Yet in the words of Alfred Lord Tennyson:
I hold it true, whate'er befall;
I feel it, when I sorrow most;
'Tis better to have loved and lost
Than never to have loved at all.
So here's to all the ups and downs. I'm told I'll be a better person because of it. I'm crying and screaming into my pillow right now, but when it all straightens out it will have been worth it. I'll look back on the good times and be glad I played the game.
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3 comments:
Well gosh now I want to try and make you feel better. I'm curious as to more of what this story involves. Love you lotz! You're beautiful and have a great personality and you will have all the dreams you desire someday, remember that and maybe that will help you get through whatever it is your going through!
Wow, your blog is like getting sucked into the middle of a book and not having access to the beginning or the end. Well, I hope you feel better. Watch that movie with Jennifer Lopez where she learns how to box or whatever and kills her husband at the end.
I have lots of good angry music! I'm sorry you had a rough night. I was up until 2 painting a friends house I would have come and broken things with you. Zac lets me buy plates at the dollar store and throw them off high places.
Sometimes just yelling helps too. If you need anything let me know.
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